Rising up within the late 1900s, there have been loads of issues within the U.S., however at the least we bought one factor proper — minivans. A number of folks I knew had SUVs, however most of my pals’ dad and mom had minivans. They had been ridiculously sensible household haulers, they usually nonetheless are as we speak, even when they don’t seem to be practically as common. As if something with room for 4 children and all their stuff is ever going to make you look cool. I imply, you are actually going to inform me with a straight face that you simply really feel cool stuffing your loved ones into a Volkswagen Atlas? Actually?
Nonetheless, I believe I’ve a means for Toyota to promote extra Siennas or at the least make the Dallas Goal Mothers sweat slightly earlier than deciding to stay with their Ford Explorers. Sure, I am speaking about partnering with Chip and Joanna Gaines to create the Sienna Magnolia Version. For those who comply with inside design tendencies carefully, you are most likely saying, “Yeah, Collin. Possibly 5 years in the past. Magnolia is out!” And also you’d largely be appropriate that lots of people have (fortunately) moved on from shiplap, faux-distressed all the pieces and horrible indicators that inform you the place you’re or what to do.
Alternatively, have you learnt what number of inside barn doorways I noticed after I was in Texas final week? Even the lodge had large barn doorways. Have you learnt what else has sliding doorways and used to return with wooden panels on the perimeters? Minivans. With slightly rebranding magic, you may simply flip these sliding doorways into “barn doorways,” and all of a sudden they’re going to be cool once more. It is such an apparent transfer, I am stunned Toyota did not consider it years in the past.
And so they say journalists make horrible product planners. Ridiculous.
Lord, bless this mess
Primarily based on a number of the homes I noticed round Dallas, the Toyota Sienna Magnolia Version would most likely need to be black and white, which, I imply, yuck. However we aren’t making an attempt to make me proud of this minivan. We’re making an attempt to promote minivans to the households who desperately want them however as a substitute insist on shopping for ever-so-slightly lifted, much less sensible minivan alternate options just because their dad and mom acknowledged how sensible they had been again within the ’80s and ’90s. Possibly there may very well be a number of paint choices.
Moreover, I do not even know if Artwork Deco would work with the Sienna’s cabin design within the first place. I do know the Magnolia identify nonetheless carries some actual weight, although. I imply, Discovery not too long ago gave them their very own community. Add a numbered plaque with Joanna Gaines’ signature on it, and Toyota might principally print cash.
Clearly, all of the wooden trim must come pre-distressed, however that is not only for aesthetics. It could additionally assist conceal all of the messes the youngsters make. I additionally demand no fewer than seven fonts on the automotive, all used to inform you what to do. Possibly put “Open” in a single font on the tailgate and “Gasoline” in a special one on the gasoline door. After all, you may’t miss the chance to make use of a 3rd so as to add “Shift” to the shift lever. How else will somebody know what they’re presupposed to do with it in case you do not actually spell it out proper in entrance of them?
There’ll, after all, be particulars that should be labored out, however I am telling you, the Toyota Sienna Magnolia Version would promote, even when it price one thing absurd, like $65,000.
*checks present Sienna pricing*
Wait, you imply to inform me you may spend $60,000 on a minivan? As we speak? Earlier than supplier markup and tariff-related value will increase? What the gosh darn heck!
